Last official night. [[MORE]] I’m not sad, but I am a bad liar. I said goodbye to Matthew today. We’re both moving to new area’s this september. Finding time is going to be harder, but I have faith and love that we will be okay. I can’t wait for the next time I see him. I got to hangout with my parents tonight, I have now a wonderful piece of my Dad’s ID to carry...
To look into my eyes and tell me Girl you know you’ve got to watch your...
Me: We live on the same floor! and 15 doors away!
Trevv: I'm so excited
Me: Its going to be a good year!
Trevv: Probably the best.
Tears! I'm thrilled my best friend is so close!
Its been two hectic days, I am moved into Res and already put in my 12 hour day making posters and signs for all the new residents! I really like the crew I am working with, all really nice and easy to get along with. Last night was a beautiful way of seeing my friends of oakville, I can’t believe that this is the last year. Okay, I’m running on 4 hours of sleep… Good night xo
I feel really really homesick..
Everything is beautiful. Amazing classes, good teachers, and my good friend in everyone of them. Thank you Sheridan for making this a beautiful last first semester.
[[MORE]] My anxiety is in full control. Thinking about leaving this house in 2 days makes me keep crying. Just thinking about it now I start to tear up. I’ve done this before but this really sucks. My Dad and I became so close, once again, and I hate leaving him. Saying goodbye to him always hurts.. My heart keeps going slow to fast, I’m shaking and this pounding headache sucks.
I found my diary from first year.. Everything is in scribbles and I underlined the word HOPE too many times. I don’t know if I should burn these pages or glue them all together so I never have to feel the way I feel again.
I made a sock bun and a head chain, and found a bedazzled head turban. I am one happy girl!
No makeup, No care
4 days till I go back to Oakville and I can honestly count the amount of people I saw on one hand.. That really makes me feel low. The fact that I’m more stressed out over friends then anything else right now isn’t what I need.
I had a beautiful dream last night. [[MORE]] Everyone from first year was there, celebrating that it was our last year sheridan would be a school. I haven’t seen anyone for 2 years , and I had no idea that all my friends would be there. I walked in to the room full of friends and everyone yelled “HEY!” at the same time. There were hugs, tears, and kisses thrown around. It was...
Even though I hate digital courses.. and yet pull out A’s.. I thought making my usb cute would make me excited for all of the lovely hard and time consuming projects… ps I am 12 ok.
A handful of people are saying ” I can’t wait to see you and your style this year, you’re so stylish, I love your clothes, you can rock anything”… But I wear boring things?..Art School.
I just realized I have 5 days left here. Instantly the words that entered my mind were along the lines of “Positive thoughts, Don’t hate everyone like you did last year, be happy, be open, and take in the most you can out of this year”. I hope I can stick with these thoughts, because I am getting nervous.
There is just something in the way that those burnt lace curtains sway in the wind. How pictures are still hanging up straight on walls that are left, and how it seems like the frame of the house is sheltering the engulfed middle like a parent would to an embarrassed child, yet with cracks to slightly peek into the beaten aftermath. I want to say it looks beautiful. The ashes and charcoaled...
Mental note and for my friends.
I leave for Oakville August 23rd I’ll be there from the 23rd - 28th The 23rd to the 25th i’ll be decorating The 26th & 27th will be moving in kids and events 28th - 1st I’ll be back in Toronto After the 1st I wont be back.
Last full week here.
Monday: Downtown w/ Natalie - Then pack at night Tuesday: Linda & Lerna? - then pack/matt? Wednesday: Matt? Thursday: Hang out with Michelle Friday: Pack Saturday: Pack Sunday: Pack
10 days before I leave for Oakville.
[[MORE]] I kept crying and crying until I couldn’t breathe or think of what I was crying about and the only thing that I could say was ” I am just so sad”. I think that was my most honest moment this summer. I felt so open and so overwhelmed by the fact that I haven’t cried for myself, for what I miss and for what I am going through.
At first I tell myself everything is okay and you are fine the way you are. Next I am regretting everything and wanting to just be better.
I can’t wait to be in the the print studio and have to be forced to watch the glass blowing program right across from me every week.. I just want to be in that program… Maybe this wont be the last of me at sheridan…
We did it, We made it. I don’t know how to even put into words that we have fully spent 365 days in love, and truly in love. Of course there were rough patches and times where I thought this was it.. but in reality this is it, This is something I want to devote my time to. This is the someone who feels and cares for me with every inch of his being. This is someone who I love with everything...
I leave tomorrow for Kingston to celebrate my One Year with Matthew. I’m thrilled to get away for a few nights and just have silence and love surround me. I can not believe it’s been a year.
It makes me sad to think of what I use to be. So intact with art and so close to being the person I always wanted to be. Here I am starting from scratch. This year will either go terribly wrong, or I will make it.